You’re minding your own business. Maybe you’re driving the car, holding your kid, or just trying to fall asleep. The street is quiet. The perimeter is secure.
Then bam. A thought kicks in your front door.
• “What if you jerk the steering wheel into traffic?”
• “Did you actually lock the back door, or is your family in danger right now?”
• “What if that cough isn’t a cold? What if you’re dying?”
Your heart starts hammering. Your palms get slick. The panic rises like a flood.
You didn’t ask for this thought. You don’t want to do these things. But the thought is screaming at you, demanding attention. It feels real. It feels like a warning.
It isn’t a warning. It’s a shakedown.
Welcome to the oldest scam in the book. Your brain is running a Protection Racket. And right now? You’re their best paying customer.
The Anatomy of the Scam
In the underworld, a protection racket works like this: A thug walks into a shop. He says, “Nice place you got here. Be a shame if something happened to it.”
He isn’t predicting the future. He is the threat.
He creates the fear, then he sells you the “safety” for a price.
Intrusive Thoughts (and OCD) work the exact same way.
1. The Thug (The Thought): Pops up with a horrifying “What If” scenario.
2. The Threat (The Anxiety): The spike of adrenaline that makes it feel dangerous.
3. The Vig (The Compulsion): This is the payment.
You Are Paying the Vig
When that thought hits, you panic. You want the fear to go away. So, you pay up.
• You Check: You run back to the door to make sure it’s locked.
• You Argue: You sit there for an hour, debating with yourself, proving you aren’t a bad person.
• You Ruminate: You replay the memory over and over, looking for “evidence.”
You think you are solving the problem. You aren’t.
You are paying the Vig (the interest).
And here is the ugly truth about blackmailers: When you pay them, they don’t go away. They might leave the shop for an hour. But they come back tomorrow. And this time? The price is higher.
Every time you argue with an intrusive thought, you are funding the enemy. You are teaching your brain that the threat is real.
The Counter-Strategy: Starve the Beast
You cannot shoot these guys. You can’t stop the thoughts from knocking on the door. The brain generates noise; that’s what it does.
But you can stop paying.
Here is the operational protocol for handling a shakedown.
1. Make the ID (Labeling)
The mob relies on disguise. They dress up as “intuition” or “conscience.” You need to strip the disguise.
When a crazy thought hits you, do not engage with the content. Do not ask “What if this is true?”
Instead, slap a label on it. Say to yourself:
“This isn’t a warning. This is a Protection Racket.”
“This is just noise from the cheap seats.”
Call it out. Acknowledge it’s there. But treat it like a drunk guy yelling on the street corner. You hear him, but you don’t stop your car to talk to him.
2. Call the Bluff (Exposure)
This is the hardest move in the game. The pros call it ERP (Exposure and Response Prevention). I call it holding the line.
The thought says: “If you don’t check the stove, the house will burn down.”
The Anxiety screams: “CHECK IT NOW!”
You do nothing.
You sit there. You let the anxiety scream. You feel the heat rising. It’s going to feel like you’re dying. It’s going to feel irresponsible.
Do. Not. Move.
You are calling their bluff. You are showing your nervous system that you can handle the threat without paying the money. Eventually, the thug gets bored. He realizes you aren’t paying today. And he leaves.
3. Cut the Wire (Refuse to Ruminate)
Rumination is just worrying in circles. It’s trying to “think” your way out of a feeling. It’s a trap.
When you catch yourself arguing with the thought (“I wouldn’t hurt anyone, I’m a nice guy, remember that time I helped the old lady…”), CUT THE WIRE.
Stop the conversation mid-sentence. Pivot your attention to something physical.
• Wash the dishes.
• Do 20 pushups.
• Read a spreadsheet.
Show the brain that the meeting is over.
The Debrief
Listen to me. You aren’t crazy. You aren’t a monster. You are just a guy with a noisy neighborhood in his head.
The thoughts don’t matter. They are just graffiti on the wall. The only thing that matters is how you respond.
Stop negotiating. Stop paying the vig. Stop arguing with terrorists.
Reclaim your territory.